Trouble at the North Pole
by gamefreak95
Summary: Calvin and Hobbes ride the Polar Express. Short, sweet, and to the point. Trust me, I'm no good summaries, but I hope you read the story! Oh yeah, No Flames! Please R&R! Chapter 9, The Fight, and Chapter 10, Back Room Blues, are up!
1. The Magic Train

Calvin and Hobbes and the Polar Express ain't mine.

* * *

**Trouble at the North Pole**

**Chapter 1: The "Magic" Train**

It was a very cold night.

Snow was falling down fast.

All was calm.

It was Christmas Eve.

Everyone was probably preparing for the arrival of Santa Claus.

Over on the other side of town, an average-sized house was sitting on a blanket of snow.

Inside, a warm fire was in the fireplace.

A woman was in the kitchen baking cookies.

A man was decorating the Christmas tree.

A boy, no older than 6 with spiky, yellow hair, a red and white shirt and blue pants, was watching TV.

A stuffed tiger was by his side.

"This is all a bunch of baloney," Calvin shouted.

He was watching the movie _The Polar Express._

"Like I'm gonna believe some train is gonna come and take me to the North Pole. This movie is stupid," he said.

Suddenly, his stuffed tiger came to life.

"Well I think this movie is good," Hobbes said.

"Your such a killjoy," Calvin said.

"Don't call me a killjoy Mister Good-Movie- Hater," spat Hobbes.

"Fine! If that's the way your gonna be!"

Calvin stood up and turned the TV off.

"Hey! I was watching that," shouted Hobbes.

"And now your not," came the reply.

Hobbes stuck out his tongue.

"Calvin, time for bed," came the voice of Calvin's mom.

Calvin (unlike usual) grabbed Hobbes and ran up to bed.

Calvin's mom came in the door.

"Why are you so eager to go to bed," she asked.

"Don't be stupid," Calvin said, "Tomorrow is Christmas. The sooner I get to bed, the sooner I get to open my presents."

Calvin's mom kissed him on the cheek.

"Good night, sweetheart," she said.

She turned out the lights and left the room.

"Oh boy," Calvin said, "Tomorrow is Christmas! I can't wait!"

"I here ya," Hobbes said.

"C'mon, let's go to sleep so Christmas will be here," whispered Calvin.

With that the two friends went to sleep.

* * *

A few hours later, there was a loud rumbling outside, followed by a loud CREEEEEEEAK.

Calvin awoke with a startle.

"What was that," he said.

"Gimme that tuna," Hobbes dreamed, "Ha ha…zzz…keep dancing, Calvin…zzz…where's the beef…"

_What is he dreaming about_, thought Calvin.

"Hobbes," Calvin whispered.

Hobbes didn't move.

"Hobbes," Calvin said a little louder.

Hobbes kept snoring.

"HOBBES," Calvin screamed.

Hobbes awoke.

"What," he said.

"I heard something outside," came Calvin.

"It's probably an animal," said Hobbes.

"But it sounded like a train."

"Calvin, it was probably a…"

But he couldn't finish.

Calvin was already running outside.

"Why do I even bother," Hobbes said.

Hobbes began to follow Calvin.


	2. The Polar Express

**Chapter 2: The Polar Express**

Hobbes found Calvin getting his coat on.

"Calvin, your insane. There's no train out there. Trains don't ride on roads," said Hobbes.

"I think it's a magic train," came the reply.

"I thought you didn't believe in magic trains," Hobbes said.

"That was until one appeared on our street," Calvin said.

"Ohh. It's the 'magic' train, Calvin," Hobbes mocked.

Calvin mumbled something under his breath

* * *

. 

Once Calvin got his coat on, he ran through the front door.

Hobbes followed.

There was a lot of fog.

"I can't see a thing," Calvin said.

"Me neither," came the voice of Hobbes.

"Hobbes, where are you?"

"I'm over here!"

"Where?"

"Here!"

"You sound close," said Calvin.

Calvin and Hobbes bumped into each other.

"Ow," they said simultaneously.

"Hey, you guys gettin' on, or what," came a mysterious voice.

"Who's there," shouted Calvin, "I'm armed!"

The fog cleared up, and a shadowy figure appeared.

"Stay back," Calvin warned.

"What the heck ya yelling for," the figure shouted, "I'm here to get you."

"Get me," Calvin shouted, alarmed.

"I mean, pick you up. Are you Calvin," he asked.

"Y-yes," Calvin stuttered.

"And you must be Hobbes."

"Correct," said Hobbes.

"Who are you," Calvin asked.

"Why, I'm the conductor. This is the Polar Express," the conductor said.

"The Polar Express! I thought that was a made-up movie," said Calvin.

"Ah, but you didn't read the credits, did you," asked the conductor.

"Well, no. I guess it-uh-slipped my mind," Calvin replied.

"If you'd've watched the credits, you'd've read that it was based on a true story," the conductor scolded.

"I told you we should've finished the movie," Hobbes said.

"Shut up," Calvin spat.

"So, are you guys, gettin' on, or what," the conductor asked.

"Well…," Calvin thought, "Okay!"

"Calvin! Your parents won't be happy," Hobbes warned.

"So," Calvin said.

"Uh-uh-your not gonna get your presents from Santa," Hobbes said quickly.

"We're going to the North Pole to actually meet Santa! I watched the movie far enough to know that," Calvin said.

He followed the conductor onto the train.

"Uh-um-Oh I give up," Hobbes shouted.

He followed Calvin onto the train.


	3. We're Going to the North Pole!

**Chapter 3: We're Going to the North Pole!**

The moment Hobbes got on the train, it started to move.

"YIKES," Hobbes screamed as he almost fell off the train.

"Hobbes, your such a baby. I won't let fall off the train," Calvin tried to say assuringly, but it didn't sound assuring to Hobbes.

The conductor opened a door that led to the seats.

There were quite a few kids sitting down and talking.

"So, conductor dude, what exactly are we here for," Calvin asked.

"Well, first of all," the conductor said, "you may refer to me as Conductor. Second of all, before you get a seat, I need to see your ticket."

"TICKET," Calvin screamed, "I don't have a ticket!"

"Check your pocket," Conductor pointed out.

Calvin reached into his pocket.

"There's nothing in there," he said.

"Hobbes, you look," Conductor said.

Hobbes pulled two tickets out of his pocket.

"Oh," Calvin said, kind of embarrassed.

"Hand me the tickets, please," Conductor said.

Calvin gave him the tickets.

The conductor punched some holes in the ticket.

Then he gave them their tickets back.

Calvin's ticket's holes were in the shape of an F.

"What's this supposed to mean," Calvin asked.

Hobbes looked at his ticket.

"My ticket has an N on it," he said.

"Dude-er-I mean, Conductor, what do these letters mean," Calvin asked.

"You'll find out soon enough," Conductor said nicely.

"But I wanna know now," Calvin whined.

"Patience, my friend," the conductor told Calvin.

"Humph," Calvin muttered.

* * *

Calvin and Hobbes found a seat and sat down.

"I don't think I like the Polar Express," Calvin pointed out, "but it'll be worth it, 'cuz we're gonna see Santa!"

"I disagree," Hobbes argued, "I like the train. The conductor is very nice."

"I think the conductor is…," Calvin started, but was interrupted by the conductor.

"Excuse me," he said nicely, but to Calvin it sounded threatening (Calvin was familiar with that tone of voice), "but would you boys like some refreshments?"

"Oh boy! I'm starved," Calvin said.

"I'll have a steak, an ice cream sundae, and a root beer," he demanded.

"I'm terribly sorry," Conductor said, annoyed, "but the only refreshments we have are hot chocolate and tuna."

"I guess I'll take hot chocolate then," Calvin said, disappointed.

"I take the tuna," Hobbes said happily.

"Okay, I'll place your orders," Conductor said.

One kid about Calvin's age came up to him.

"What do you want," Calvin mumbled.

"I just wanted to know," the kid began, "are we really going to the North Pole?"

"Well, of course we're going to the North Pole," Calvin told him.

"Really! Wow! Thanks," the kid said.

"Don't get used to it," Calvin said grumpily.

The kid ran back to his seat.


	4. A New Friend and Spaceman Spiff

**Chapter 4: A New Friend/Spaceman Spiff**

"Ya know," Hobbes told Calvin, "you should've been nicer to that kid. He just asked a question."

"What do I care? He just wasted my valuable time," Calvin replied.

Hobbes gave Calvin a stern look.

"You should apologize to him," Hobbes scolded.

"What's my motivation," Calvin asked calmly.

* * *

"I'm sorry I was such a jerk back there," Calvin told the kid.

"That's okay," he replied, "I don't mind."

"Really," Calvin said, amazed.

Calvin began to walk away.

"Wait," the kid said, "I didn't catch your name."

"My name," Calvin asked, "Uhh-Calvin."

"Mine's John," the kid told Calvin, "Do you think we could be friends?"

"Friends," Calvin sounded shocked.

"Yeah! You look like a nice boy," John said.

"You think I'm nice," said Calvin, even more shocked.

"Plus," John began, "I don't have any friends."

"Neither do I," Calvin told him.

"So, can we be friends," John asked.

"Hmmm…," Calvin thought, "Sure we can be friends."

John looked very happy.

"Let me get my tiger, Hobbes," Calvin said.

"You have a tiger," John said.

"Don't worry. He won't eat you," Calvin told John.

* * *

"I made friends with that kid," Calvin told Hobbes back at their seat.

"Really," Hobbes replied, "Am I gettin' Punk'd?"

"No," Calvin spat.

* * *

"Hey, John," Calvin called, "Meet Hobbes."

John looked the stuffed tiger over.

"He's…um…neat," he said.

"Thank you," Hobbes said.

There was a long silence.

"Okay," Calvin said finally, "Whadda you wanna do?"

Just then, the door burst open, and a bunch of waiters with tuna cans and mugs came in.

They gave Calvin and John a mug and Hobbes got a tuna can.

Then they went to the other kid's seats.

Calvin sipped from his hot chocolate.

His face turned a bright red.

Steam came out of his ears and nostrils.

"AHHHHHHH," he screamed.

He stuck his head out the open window.

He took a deep breath, and the cold air stopped the steam.

Calvin's face converted back to normal.

"That wasn't so bad he said," he said.

* * *

"Now whadda you wanna do," Calvin asked.

"I don't know," John replied.

"I know," Calvin said, "We can play Spaceman Spiff!"

"Who," John asked.

"Spaceman Spiff! Ya know, the intergalactic warrior," Calvin told John.

John looked puzzled.

Calvin sighed.

"I show ya," he said.

Suddenly, the whole world turned pitch black.

Stars and planets popped out of nowhere.

Calvin, Hobbes, and John were just floating in the middle of it all.

Calvin pajamas turned into a space suit, and goggles formed onto his eyes.

A glass dome formed over Calvin's head.

A metal dome formed over his torso.

A series of buttons appeared on the metal dome.

Calvin was now piloting through space in a spaceship while Hobbes and John watched.

"I have a bad feeling about this," Hobbes told John.

"_Spaceman Spiff pilots through the uncharted galaxy X-1_," Calvin said.

He started running around the train.

"_Our hero lands on a small crater," _the fake astronaut said.

"AHHHHHH," a girl screamed.

In one pop, the blackness turned back into the Polar Express.

Calvin looked around.

Everyone was looking at him.

He looked down and saw that the "crater" he had landed on happened to be the head of a girl about 9 years old.

"GET THIS LITTLE BRAT OFFA ME," she screamed.

"Oops," Calvin said.


	5. Driving the Polar Express

**Chapter 5: Driving the Polar Express**

The conductor came running into the seating room.

"What the heck is happenin'," he asked.

He saw Calvin on the screaming girl's head.

"Young man," Conductor said, "what do you think your doing?"

"Heh-heh," Calvin fake laughed, "funny story, really…"

"HE WAS RUNNING AROUND THE TRAIN DOING GOSH KNOWS WHAT AND THEN HE JUMPED ON MY HEAD," the girl blurted out.

"That's not true," Calvin said quickly.

Conductor raised his eyebrow.

"Okay, maybe some of it's true," Calvin said.

The conductor didn't say anything.

"All right," Calvin shouted, "It's true! I did it, and I'm darn proud of it too!"

Everyone stared at him, wide eyed (except for Hobbes who just snickered).

"I saw it on Judge Judy once," Calvin shrugged.

* * *

"Calvin," Conductor began, "I think you'd better come with me."

"Never," Calvin screamed, "Spaceman Spiff will never surrender to the alien enemy!"

Everyone giggled (except for John).

Hobbes was laughing his head off.

"Shut up," Calvin yelled at Hobbes.

"Excuse me," Conductor said threateningly.

"I was talking to Hobbes," Calvin pointed out.

Once again, everyone laughed (except for John and Hobbes).

"I don't see what's so funny about talking to a tiger who can talk," Hobbes told John.

"Calvin," the conductor said louder, "I think you might want to come with me."

"Well, I don't," Calvin smart mouthed.

"Ooooooooo," the crowd of kids said.

Calvin headed toward his seat.

"Calvin," Conductor said even louder.

Calvin didn't answer.

"Calvin," Conductor said much louder.

Calvin sat down next to John.

"CALVIN," the conductor screamed.

Everyone jumped.

"Y-yes," Calvin stammered.

"I think you better come with me," Conductor replied.

Hobbes snickered.

Calvin gave him a stern look.

"O-okay," he told Conductor, "but can I bring Hobbes?"

"No way," Hobbes whispered, "I'm not going with you."

Calvin shushed him.

"Of course you can bring Hobbes," the conductor said sweetly.

Calvin grabbed Hobbes and went with Conductor.

"No! I don't wanna go," Hobbes whispered.

"Too bad," Calvin whispered back.

Hobbes started to mumble things under his breath.

* * *

As Calvin walked, he heard kids whisper things like, "He's gonna throw them off the train," and, "There goners," and, "That poor tiger! Why does he have to go! He didn't do anything wrong!"

The more Calvin heard, the more scared he got.

After what seemed like an eternity, they finally reached the door.

_Oh man! He's gonna throw me off the train_, Calvin thought, _This is all John's fault! If he wasn't bored, than I wouldn't've played Spaceman Spiff!_

Conductor opened the door and led Calvin and Hobbes outside.

Calvin stared at the ground.

It was moving fast.

Calvin and Hobbes gulped.

_This is it_, Calvin thought, _He's gonna throw me off the train into the cold, cold night miles away from my house_.

Calvin suddenly realized what was going to happen.

_I'm not going to be able to get home_, he thought, _and I'm going to go hungry, and that means Hobbes will too._

Calvin looked at his tiger friend, who was just as scared as he was.

_But Hobbes is a tiger_, Calvin thought, _he eats humans when he's hungry._

He looked down at his body.

_I'm a human!_

Calvin was really scared now.

_There's only one thing to do_, he thought.

* * *

"PLEASE don't throw me off the train," Calvin pleaded, "Please! I'm just a kid! I can't get home on my own! Hobbes'll eat me if he gets hungry! PLEASE…"

As Calvin kept pleading, Conductor looked up from keys he was holding.

"…I beg of you," Calvin finally ended.

"Son, I'm not gonna throw you off the train," the conductor said.

"No! Please… huh," Calvin said, confused.

"I'm not gonna throw you off," Conductor told Calvin.

"Bu-wha-then, what _are _you gonna do with us," Calvin asked.

"Why, I'm giving you a special job," Conductor told Calvin and Hobbes, "You see, the navigator of the train has had some problems."

"What kind of problems," Calvin asked.

"Well, he kinda lost his-um-uh," Conductor stammered.

* * *

"Where on Earth is my hat," the navigator of the train said while searching through the snow.

* * *

"Well, he just can't drive the train right now, and I was hoping you could," Conductor said.

Calvin burst through the door and ran straight for the controls.

"Either that door wasn't locked," Conductor pointed out, "or you've got sonic boom."

* * *

"All right, Calvin," the conductor said, "I need to tell you what controls what. This controls…"

But Calvin wasn't listening.

Instead, he was thinking of the North Pole.

_Yes! I'm finally going to meet Santa!_, he thought, _he'll probably give me the entire _bag _of toys because I've been so good this year._

Hobbes, however, was listening to what the conductor said.

"…and that's all the controls," Conductor concluded, "got it?"

"Got it, chief," Calvin said.

Conductor mumbled something under his breath.

* * *

"All right, Hobbes," Calvin said after the conductor left, "let's get started."

"Are you sure you were listening," Hobbes asked, "because it seemed like you were thinking about something else."

"Of course I was listening," Calvin spat, "Now, how do I start this baby up?"

"It is started up," Hobbes pointed out, "How else would we be moving?"

"Oh! I knew that," Calvin said.

Hobbes raised an eyebrow.

* * *

_HONK HONK!_

Calvin pulled down on the train whistle.

"Oh, man," he exclaimed, "I've always wanted to do that!"

* * *

"Wow!Drivin' the trainis easy," Calvin exclaimed.

He pulled out a comic book and began to read it.

"Do you always keep that in your pocket," Hobbes asked.

"Just in case," Calvin winked.

* * *

"Hey, Calvin, what's that," asked Hobbes.

"Hmm," Calvin replied, not looking up from his comic book.

"Calvin," Hobbes said a little worried.

"What," Calvin said.

"Look at that," Hobbes said as he pointed at a sharp wall of ice coming out of the ground.

"Captain Napalm got kidnapped! That can't be," Calvin said.

"What? Calvin, are you listening to me," Hobbes asked.

"Oh, that's nice," Calvin said, not paying attention to Hobbes.

"CALVIN," screamed Hobbes.

"What," Calvin asked with annoyance, "I'm trying to read my comic, Hobbes! I'm sure whatever you have you have to say can wait."

He went back to his comic book.

Hobbes got very angry.

He grabbed Calvin's head and turned it toward the windshield.

"Ow-hey! What're you doing," Calvin said.

"Look," Hobbes said impatiently.

Calvin saw the sharp point that was 100 yards away from them.

"Hey! Look at that! Now there's something you don't see everyday," Calvin said.

He didn't have a clue what was going to happen.

"WE'RE GOING TO CRASH," screamed Hobbes.

Calvin suddenly came back to planet Earth.

"Oh," he said, "AHHHHHHHHH!"


	6. Hobbes to the Rescue!

_Note: The "Where on Earth is my hat?" thing is supposed to be a joke. Ya see, the navigator lost his hat and he made such a big deal that he couldn't drive without it. So everyone who didn't understand that, now you do._

**Chapter 6: Hobbes to the Rescue!**

"AHHHHH," screamed Calvin, "What am I going to do? I don't know how to drive this thing!"

"Ah-hah," shouted Hobbes, "You weren't paying attention, were you?"

"Well," began Calvin frantically, "ya see… I was paying attention. But then I started to-uh-lose my train of thought."

Hobbes raised an eyebrow.

"OKAY," Calvin screamed, "I didn't pay attention!"

"Santa not going to be happy with this," Hobbes pointed out.

Calvin gasped.

"Oh no! I forgot about Santa," Calvin said, worried.

"Well, serves you right," Hobbes said.

"PLEASE HOBBES," Calvin screamed, "You have to help me! If you do, I'll apologize for everything bad I've done this year!"

Hobbes thought for a moment.

"Well…"

The sharp point was 75 yards away.

"HOBBES," Calvin shouted, "You've gotta save everyone."

Hobbes gave it one last thought.

"Okay, but I'm not doin' it for you," Hobbes said, "I'm doin' it for everyone else."

Calvin looked relieved and angry at the same time.

* * *

The point was now 50 yards away.

Hobbes got up to the control seat.

"Okay," he said, "let's get to work (by 'let's', I mean 'me')"

He looked the controls over as Calvin watched.

"Hmmm…," thought Hobbes, "Where are the brakes?"

25 yards.

"Hurry up, Hobbes," said Calvin.

"I can't remember where the brakes are," Hobbes said.

20 yards.

"Faster, Hobbes."

"Hmmm…"

15 yards.

"Think, Hobbes."

Calvin was really worried now.

"Where are the brakes," Hobbes asked himself.

10 yards.

"Hobbes."

Calvin's voice was shaking.

"Hmmm…," thought Hobbes, "I remember Conductor saying they were on this side… or was it this side?"

5 yards.

Calvin could see the frost on the icicle.

"Now, this is ludicrous," said Hobbes, "Why have so many buttons to control a train?"

3 yards.

"Hobbes, you better hurry," said Calvin.

His voice was so shaky, you could hardly understand him.

2 yards.

"HOBBES," Calvin screamed.

"Ah, here they are," said Hobbes.

Hobbes switched on the brakes.

All of the sudden, the train stopped.

Calvin went flying forward.

The tip of the train tapped the ice, causing it to fall over and shatter into pieces so small, you couldn't even see them.

"Anyone got an extra pair of underwear," asked Calvin.

* * *

Conductor came bursting through the door.

"CALVIN," he screamed, "What were you thinking! The whole train is in a jumble because you switched on the emergency brakes!"

"Sir, I can explain," Calvin said, "There was this giant ice thingy that we were going to crash into and I had to put on the brakes or else we'd've crashed and we'd've died and…"

Calvin started to take deep breaths.

"Take it easy Calvin," Conductor said, "Don't hurt yourself. You saved everyone's lives. You should be rewarded for your bravery."

"Oh-really," Calvin said excitedly.

Hobbes rolled his eyes.

"C'mon," said Conductor, "Let's go give you that reward."


	7. Rewards of Guilt

_Hello. It is I, gamefreak95, and I am back after over a year. Here is the brand-new Chapter 7. Enjoy!_

**Chapter 7: Rewards of Guilt**

Calvin grabbed Hobbes and followed Conductor into the seating room.

"Everyone," Conductor began, "This little boy just saved your lives."

Hobbes rolled his eyes.

"You mean that freak?!" exclaimed the 9-year-old girl Calvin that "landed" on.

Calvin stuck his tongue out.

The conductor cleared his throat.

"Now, I think it would be nice if you all thanked Calvin for saving you," he said firmly.

There was a bunch of groans from everyone (except John).

"You know, Santa's might see this," Conductor said calmly.

"THANK YOU, CALVIN!"

* * *

After everyone reluctantly thanked him, Calvin took his seat next to John.

"Did you really save us?" asked John.

"Of course I did! After Conductor took me outta here, I got to drive the train," Calvin replied triumphantly.

"So-um- how exactly did you save us?" the confused John asked.

"Oh! Yeah, you see, we were going to crash into this huge icicle sticking out of the ground," Calvin began, "and just as we were about to crash into it, I hit the brakes and saved the day!"

"Yeah right," said Hobbes, angrily.

"Wow! Really? That's amazing!" said John.

"Thank you," Calvin replied.

"Why did you wait to hit the brakes just before we hit the icicle?" John asked.

"Oh-um-I wanted to-uh-increase the suspense," Calvin lied.

Hobbes glared at Calvin.

"Calvin," he said, " may I speak to you for a moment please?"

"Uh, sure. John, I'll be right back. Hobbes wants to talk to me," Calvin told John.

"Ok," John said, puzzled by the fact that Calvin was going to talk to a stuffed animal.

* * *

Calvin and Hobbes sat down in an unoccupied seat.

"Calvin!" Hobbes whispered, "Saying that you hit the brakes when I did is plagiarism!"

"Plagia-what?" Calvin asked.

"Copying! Santa's is not gonna be happy about this!" Hobbes scolded.

"Oh no! It's really that bad?" Calvin asked worriedly.

"Yes! Now you need to tell everyone that you weren't paying attention to Conductor and that I saved everyone!" Hobbes shouted in whisper.

"Oh man," Calvin said, "Do I have to?"

Hobbes lifted his hand up, so that Calvin could see his claws.

* * *

"Everyone," Calvin said nervously, "I have something to tell you all."

But before he could say anymore, there was a loud thump outside the seating room.

Everyone screamed.

The door opened up, and there stood the navigator.

"Hey, Conductor," he said wearily, "I found my hat."

Then he fell down, unconscious, on the floor.


	8. Apologies of a 6 Year Old

**Chapter 8: Apologies of a 6-Year-Old**

After Conductor dragged the navigator away, Calvin began his apology again.

"Everyone, I have to confess, I-" he started.

Then he saw that everyone was looking at him.

Conductor had come in to tell Calvin that he needed to drive again, so he was listening, too.

Calvin gulped.

"I-um-I-"

Everyone had his or her eyes on him.

Calvin started to sweat.

Hobbes smirked.

"Um-um-OK! I DIDN'T SAVE US!" Calvin blurted out.

"Busted," Hobbes said to himself.

"Calvin," Conductor said, "if you didn't save us, who did?"

"Hobbes," Calvin said shyly.

Then everyone was silent.

* * *

Calvin started back to his seat, but the conductor stopped him.

"Calvin, I am very disappointed in you," he told him.

"I'm sorry," Calvin replied.

"And I'm sorry to you, Hobbes," Conductor said to Hobbes, "for you saved everyone."

"It's ok, it's not your fault," Hobbes replied.

"Calvin, I don't think that Santa is going to be happy about this," Conductor said.

"I know," Calvin said quietly.

"However," the kind conductor said, "I will mention to him that you apologized to everyone, and I think he'll like that."

"Wow! Really? Thank you!" Calvin said excitedly.

Conductor smiled as Calvin ran back to his seat.

* * *

"Now, don't you feel better that you've apologized?" Hobbes asked Calvin as they headed back to John's seat.

"A little," Calvin replied, "cuz Conductor gonna tell Santa."

"That's the only reason you feel good?" Hobbes asked, "Because I can tell Santa about the 'Noodle Incident'"

"THAT NEVER HAPPENED!" Calvin yelled.

* * *

When they got back to the seat, John was looking out the window into the falling snow.

"What's up, buddy?" Calvin asked as he sat down.

He didn't get an answer.

"Hey, John, what's up?"

Still no answer.

There was an awkward silence.

Then John spoke.

"You lied to me," he began, "Friends don't lie to each other."

"John it was just one little white lie," Calvin replied.

"It wasn't a 'little white lie'," John turned to face Calvin now, "I thought you were a hero! You didn't save us. You stupid stuffed tiger did! And I don't think that's possible, but still!"

"Stuffed?" said Hobbes angrily.

"John, I-" Calvin started.

"I don't want to here it," John said, as he turned back to the window.

Calvin got up and walked to an empty seat.


	9. The Fight

**Chapter 9: The Fight**

Calvin and Hobbes sat down in an empty seat near the back of the train.

"What did I do?" Calvin asked.

"Well," Hobbes began, "You lied to everyone on the train and now your only friend besides me is mad at you."

"That jerk!" Calvin exclaimed, "So I lied! Big deal! I lie to you all the time, and you don't care!"

"What was that?" Hobbes asked angrily.

"Nothing," Calvin said quietly.

* * *

"You know you have to apologize to John," Hobbes told Calvin.

"Why? John should apologize to me!" Calvin replied angrily.

"What for?" Hobbes asked.

"Ummmmmmm…for being mad at me!" Calvin told him.

"Uh-huh," Hobbes said.

"Ok! Fine! I should apologize! But I'm not gonna!" Calvin said loudly.

"Why not?" Hobbes said sternly.

"Because I already apologized to him!" Calvin was practically shouting now.

"That was for something different!" came Hobbes's reply.

There was a long silence between the two of them.

All of a sudden, Calvin lunged at Hobbes.

"YAAAAAHHHHH!" he screamed.

* * *

Everyone on the train was looking at the kid who seemed to be losing to a stuffed tiger.

"I don't care about what you think, you stupid flea bag!" Calvin shouted.

"Oh yeah! Well bring it on! Don't say that to me! I'm not gonna apologize to John!" Calvin screamed at Hobbes.

John looked up at Calvin, but Calvin was too busy to notice.

For a moment, they stopped fighting to catch their breath.

John was going to say something to Calvin, but before he could, the two began fighting again.

* * *

Conductor heard the commotion from the front of the train.

He looked through the door window and saw Calvin fighting Hobbes.

"Here we go again!" he said to himself.

* * *

"You stupid, ugly, horrible excuse for a tiger! I will-"

But Calvin was interrupted as he was lifted in the air.

Calvin looked up into the angry face of Conductor.

"Hey, Conductor! How's it going?" Calvin said nervously.

"Follow me into the back room," Conductor said sternly, "and bring Hobbes."

* * *

"Oh, great! Thanks a lot, Calvin!" Hobbes whispered sarcastically to Calvin.

"Shut up!" Calvin hissed.

As Calvin and Hobbes were being led into the back room everyone but John "Oooooooo"ed.

"SHUT UP!" Calvin screamed

Conductor looked at him angrily.

"PLEASE!" Calvin quickly added.


	10. Back Room Blues

**Chapter 10: Back Room Blues**

Conductor led Calvin and Hobbes to the back room of the train.

"Listen, Conductor, I can explain!" Calvin pleaded.

"Calvin, what do you think you're doing?!" Conductor scolded.

"Well, you see, Hobbes was being dumb, and I-" Calvin started.

"Oh yeah, right!" Hobbes said sarcastically.

"SHUT UP!" Calvin screamed at him.

"Calvin!" Conductor shouted, "Santa will not be happy about this!"

"Couldn't you put in a little word for me?" Calvin asked sheepishly.

"No! Not unless you earn it!" Conductor said seriously.

"But you said…" Calvin argued.

"I will tell Santa about that, but that won't make up for all the other trouble you've caused on this train!" Conductor told him.

"But-uh-I-uh-PLEASE!!!! I BEG OF YOU!! TELL SANTA I'VE BEEN GOOD!!!!!" Calvin pleaded frantically.

"I tell you what," the kind conductor proposed, "If you stay back here with Hobbes…"

"Aw man! I gotta stay back here!" Calvin complained.

"If you stay back here with Hobbes," Conductor said annoyed, "and don't cause trouble, I'll put in a good word for you."

"THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!" Calvin shouted as he raced around the car.

"You should see him when he eats 'Chocolate Frosted Sugar Bombs'," Hobbes said.

* * *

When Calvin finally calmed down, Conductor headed back to the front of the train.

"I'll be back to check on you," he told Calvin.

"Alright! I'll be good!" Calvin said cheerfully.

"Uh-huh," Conductor questioned Calvin's cheerfulness.

As Conductor opened the door, all the kid's but John, who was still looking out the window, "Oooooooo"ed.

"SHUT…" Calvin began, but he saw Conductor's glare, "…the door behind you."

Conductor lingered for a moment, but then proceeded to the front car.

* * *

After the conductor left, Calvin and Hobbes sat in silence for a little.

"Hobbes, I'm sorry I argued with you," Calvin said apologetically.

Hobbes raised his eyebrow.

"…and for fighting you."

Hobbes still wasn't satisfied.

"…and for biting. Ya happy!"

"Yes I am," Hobbes said happily, "Apology accepted."

* * *

Once again, they sat in silence.

"You should've heard yourself pleading to Conductor," Hobbes laughed.

"Humph," Calvin mumbled.

* * *

After an hour or two, the door opened and Conductor walked in.

"Boys, I have good news," he said, "We'll be at the North Pole in a half hour, and you have been good. Keep it up, and I'll put in a good word for you, Calvin."

"Thank you very much, Conductor," Calvin said in his fake cheerful voice, "And might I say, that is a very nice hat you are wearing!"

"Don't push it," Conductor said sternly as he went to tell the other kids.

* * *

"This is great!" Calvin exclaimed.

"I know! We're gonna see Santa!" Hobbes agreed.

"He'll probably tell me how good I've been," Calvin bragged.

Hobbes tried to force back laughter.

"Do I dare mention the 'Noodle Incident'?" Hobbes asked.

"THAT NEVER HAPPENED!" Calvin yelled.

* * *

Calvin and Hobbes could here Conductor talking to the other kids.

"…and you all must have your tickets when we get there," they heard him say.

"Hobbes, you have our tickets, don't you?" Calvin asked nervously.

"Got 'em right here," Hobbes said as he pulled the tickets out of his pocket.

"Good!" Calvin said triumphantly.

"Hey, Calvin, what's that?" Hobbes said, pointing to a golden object that seemed to be flying from John's seat.

"Hmmmm…" Calvin said curiously, "I don't know"

The object flew through the car and slipped through the top crack of the door.

"It's John's ticket!" Hobbes exclaimed, realizing what the object was.

"Ha! He's not gonna get to go!" Calvin laughed.

"Calvin!" Hobbes scolded, "We have to go after it!"

"Why?" Calvin asked.

"Because!" Hobbes told.

"I'm not goin' after it!" Calvin exclaimed, "I've done enough for that backstabber."

"Fine! I'll get it myself!" Hobbes said and went after the ticket.

"Hobbes!" Calvin shouted, "Come back!"

Hobbes kept going until he reached the caboose.

Calvin groaned, but decided that he had to go with Hobbes.

"This looks like a job for Stupendous Man!"


End file.
